The H. L. Burke Random Interview is not like other interviews. The questions are all over the place. They have no purpose. Their purpose is their lack of purpose.There are nine questions because cats, but these nine questions are subject to change without notice, so the questions one person answers may not be the questions answered by the next author.
This week we have captured an elusive Frances Hoelsema. Let us observe her in her natural habitat ...
- During an Alien Invasion what would be your weapon of choice?
A rocket launcher – the force is so strong that more than likely the aliens will be gone!
- If you could enter any fictional world, which would you choose?
Narnia! I love that story, and I think that it’s totally awesome that most creatures are half animals/half humans.
- Favorite flavor (of what? EVERYTHING!)?
Chocolate and peanut butter together!
- Who is your fictional best friend and what activities do you choose to do together?
Anna from Frozen would be my best friend. We would go on adventures, build snowmen, ride our bikes down the halls, go to coronations and always protect family.
- Rename yourself. Your new name can be silly, pretty, meaningful, whatever you want, but it CAN’T be your real name or penname, no matter how awesome that might be. Sorry, Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop is taken.
Well, I never was a huge fan of the name Frances because it’s such an old name. That’s partly why I made my email address name bemarie. My middle name is Marie and I think it’s a very nice name – nicer than Frances anyway. So I guess I would name myself Marie.
6. Write me some Vogon Poetry (for those not in the know, Vogon poetry is so awful you’ll want to rip your ears off and eat them. It’s considered a method of torture in many corners of the galaxy. So give us your worst).
This is going to be completely horrible seeing as I have no idea what I’m doing, but here goes:
In the bottom quadrant of the room I lay
Chained down keeping rodents at bay
My teeth clenching any words I can say
Begging the keepers to bring on the day
Alas, the darkness, my old friend, will stay
This gruesome torture was my pay
Boy I wished that things would be okay
I gave up…come what may
7. You have superpowers. What are they and what do you do with them?
I’d definitely be able to fly. That’s something I’ve always wanted to be able to do. If I could fly, I would travel around the world whenever I felt like it. Another superpower would be the ability to not gain weight no matter how lazy I was or how poorly I ate (yes, I love my desserts and to lounge around in my pjs).
8. You find a talking animal. What sort of animal is it and what’s the first thing you do?
A CAT! I love cats and wish my cats could talk. The first thing I would do is have a great conversation with them!
9. If this question were any question in the world, what question would you want it to be and how would you answer it?
The question would be, if you could be a fifth ninja turtle, what would your name and color be? The answer would be Picaso and yellow.