Random Interview Saturday! Benita J. Prins

The H. L. Burke Random Interview is not like other interviews. The questions are all over the place. They have no purpose. Their purpose is their lack of purpose.
There are nine questions because cats, but these nine questions are subject to change without notice, so the questions one person answers may not be the questions answered by the next author.
Our next author zooms in on a chariot drawn by sea serpents (it's an all-terrain chariot). It's Benita J. Prins!
Benita J. Prins

Author Bio
Benita J. Prins has been writing since she was knee-high to a grasshopper. Her busy imagination fuels her love for fantasy – the seeds of which appeared when she read The Lord of the Rings at age eleven (still her favourite book!). She loves to be inventing and feels at a loss when she doesn't have a fantasy location to flesh out. When she's not writing, she keeps busy with music (piano, organ, singing… especially singing), filmmaking, and increasing her already enormous book collection. Some of her favourite authors are J.R.R. Tolkien, C.S. Lewis, Michael O’Brien, John Buchan, Jane Austen, and Charlotte Brontë.

Benita lives in southwestern Ontario, Canada with her family.

If you had a store, what would you sell?
Scads of lined paper and pretty notebooks, and liquid ink pens, and cool books. Also much milk chocolate, because I could partake whenever I so desired (which is always).

Best writing tool: pen, pencil, keyboard, or crayon?
I ought to say “Pen, of course” to show everyone how dedicated and traditional I am, but the truth is “Keyboard, of course,” because of course. Although I do like to write by hand sometimes. I usually do when I get writer’s block, or when the internet is distracting me again. After all, it’s a most writerly feeling to scribble out words and make clever notes in the margins.

I feel I should observe that crayons are fat, melt in the heat, and make sticky sounds when you lift them off the page. Therefore, they are not useful writing tools.

What’s your sign? Mine is that one that warns you to watch for falling cows.
Which kind of sign is this referring to? I like road signs. Particularly the one that warns about a truck entrance. I’m not sure the driver of the truck pictured thereon actually passed his road test, considering it looks like he’s still going 80kph approximately three feet from the intersection.

On more careful examination of the question this seems to be asking what my sign is. Needless to say, road signs do not belong to me. (This is why I don’t spray paint them or knock them over. Evidently other people do not have the same scruples, or else that’s what the provincial government does on their days off.) My sign is the one that warns you I’m getting angry. It’s hard to interpret this sign correctly. If I’m smiling brightly and being very sweet and nice, you may be ticking me off. Needless to say, most people don’t realise this until too late.

What weather is your writing? A dark and stormy night? A sunshiny day?
A pompous dark grey cumulus cloud threatening rain but ultimately dissipating so that the sun shines through.

For proof of the pomposity, read my high school essays.

On a scale of 1 to 10, what do you think your chances are of surviving the zombie invasion?
9? I’m timid, so I would hide away. I’m clever, so I would hide away in a clever spot. I over-organise, so I would hide away in a clever spot with food and blankets and other things I might need. Also, I’m constantly thirsty and carry a water bottle with me at all times – so even if the zombies made a surprise attack at least I would have water.

You can time travel in an oddly specific way that only allows you to visit other authors. Where do you go and what do you do?
Obviously, visit J.R.R. Tolkien, and ask him how to write long books, because mine always turn out so short.

Which natural element (earth, wind, fire, water) do you feel the greatest kinship with?
Wind. When the wind is strong I love to go out and let it buffet me around. It makes me feel small and humble amidst the power of creation. Fire, on the other hand, is my greatest fear.

What mythical creature do you most wish to be real?
I *cowers* don’t much like mythical creatures? But the ones I wouldn’t mind being real are black imps. I used to read so many fairy tales and my older brother and I were particularly fascinated by black imps. Possibly for philological reasons, now I think about it. ‘Imp’ is... well, an impish word, and paired with ‘black’ it just flows so intriguingly, especially to a seven-year-old. Then of course black imps were the extra naughty ones, which I think spoke to my brother and me on a deep level. I should probably not go into that.

If you had to board yourself up in a store to wait out the apocalypse, what store would you choose?
Chapters. There are many good, or at least tolerable, books to occupy myself with, and I could bombard the zombies with the other two-thirds of the stock. Whilst it may not wound them overmuch, at least the literary tripe contained therein would distract them. Furthermore, the feelings of disgust conjured in them by the aforementioned literary tripe might even bring back a semblance of humanity. Thus I would literally have singlehandedly saved the world.

If this question were any question in the world, what question would you want it to be and how would you answer it?
Q: What is the best feeling in the world?
A: Going to bed early knowing you can sleep in the next day.
I feel that this conveys many truths about me.

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