Random Interview Saturday! C. S. Johnson

The H. L. Burke Random Interview is not like other interviews. The questions are all over the place. They have no purpose. Their purpose is their lack of purpose.
There are nine questions because cats, but these nine questions are subject to change without notice, so the questions one person answers may not be the questions answered by the next author.
A MASSIVE explosion occurs. When the dust clears, our next author has arrived and it is C. S. Johnson!
C. S. Johnson 


C. S. Johnson is the author of several young adult novels, including sci-fi and fantasy adventures such as the Starlight Chronicles series, the Once Upon a Princess saga, and the Divine Space Pirates trilogy. With a gift for sarcasm and an apologetic heart, she currently lives in Atlanta with her family. Find out more at http://www.csjohnson.me.

The Interview
How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
The same number of pecks of pickled peppers Peter Piper would pick if Peter Piper was in a forced labor camp, although I guess he is in one because at the end of the poem they can’t find the peck of pickled peppers, and the tale of Peter Piper was written before “innocent until proven guilty” was more of a mainstream thing. (If nothing else, there’s no way Peter Piper would be rich enough to get special privilege when it would come to the law. If he was, Peter Piper would have his personal servant picking that peck of pickled peppers.)

You have superpowers. What are they and what do you do with them?
I would have the power to make anyone in the world nap at the snap of my fingers. I would use it for all sorts of funny things—I’ve got to do something that will top that story of Napoleon taking a bath and making a decision on the Louisiana Purchase—but probably mostly on my children first and foremost.
They say their version of “Hi!” while I write this.

I know exercise is good for me, but it is not entertaining. What methods do you suggest for making workouts more fun?
LARPing. That is all.

What is your ideal writing space?
I would have a room with three or four different desks, one with a pool desk, one with a regular desk by a window, and another one where I could stand, and then probably one more where I could just have it on my lap and move it. I would also like a minifridge nearby, but one that magically cleaned itself so when I got into the mood to buy something weird to eat while I write and then I don’t eat it, I don’t have to worry about feeling bad I didn’t eat it.

You can time travel in an oddly specific way that only allows you to visit other authors. Where do you go and what do you do?
I would go visit Charles Dickins before he wrote “A Christmas Carol” and give him the right inspiration, only I would tell him to make the Ghost of Christmas Future a woman in honor of my visit. I would also tell him to be nicer to his wife.

Give yourself a totally new look, as dramatic as you want. What is it?
Nothing. I’m actually pretty happy with how I look. And I do believe I’ll get my ultimate makeover in Heaven.

If you had to write only in one crayon color for the rest of your life, what would you choose?
Blue violet, like the white springtime violets.

What film era do you feel best represents your day to day life?
If distractions were explosions, any Michael Bay film.
But real life? Probably the nineties, since I haven’t shot a gun more complicated than a Sig Sauer.

If this question were any question in the world, what question would you want it to be and how would you answer it?
42 for kicks, and a picture of a cat chasing a laser dot for giggles.

Connect with the Author!

WEBSITE (Yes, different from the blog, sorry):  http://csjohnson.me